The Rules Of Hospitality

(Excerpted from Futuwat namah by Khwaja Husayn Wa’iz Kashifi Sabzawari An Naqshbandi Translated by M. Nur Abdussalam)

Know that entertaining guests was the practice of Abraham. Going to dinners and accepting invitations was the practice of the Prophet. Ali said: [Even if I am invited for sheep’s feet, I would accept.] In entertaining guests and being a guest there are some rules and conditions which the people of the Way must not disdain to know.

If asked: How many are the rules and requirements for entertaining guests? Say: Fourteen: Two are absolute, six are requirements, and six are of good manners.

If asked: What are the two absolutes? Say:

1.      The guest be given clean and religiously lawful food.
2.      The hospitality must be for God, and not out of personal motive, hypocrisy, or for recompense.

If asked: What are the six requirements? Say:

1.      The guest must be greeted and shown a pleasant place to sit.
2.      One must be cheerful and smiling with the guest.
3.      One must display no displeasure no matter how many guests arrive.
4.      One must be exceedingly respectful to the uninvited guest.
5.      One must not stint, but give everything available to the guests.
6.      One must eschew affectation and offer what one is able to. 

If asked: What are the six rules of good manners? Say:

1.      One should ask the guest what kind of food he would prefer.
2.      Give him the best food.
3.      One should not importune him excessively while eating.
4.      When the guest leaves, one should accompany him at least seven paces.
5.      One should not apologize for the food; that smacks of egotism.
6.      One should not place the guest under obligation; rather one should thank God much for the favour He gave in having that person share his sustenance at the dining cloth. As the master said:

Whomever you see in the world eats his own daily bread,
Whether it be at your dining cloth of his own;
Thus you must be grateful for the guest whenever
He eats his own food at the generous dining cloth of your good deeds.